A Rash for Christmas

Who would ask for a rash for Christmas? Who would even celebrate a rash for Christmas?

We would.

We'd already enjoyed our Christmas Eve dinner with my mother. We woke early and discovered that Santa still brings stockings to grown ups even when they are away from home. Stockings are one of my favorite parts of Christmas, even if their contents include items that are in the pantry most of the time anyway. And one can never go wrong with chocolate. Fortified with the joy of giving and chocolate, we made it to our 8 am infusion appointment. While Dom got his magnesium, I took my mom on a tour of our last seven months. I wasn't prepared for the tears that welled up as I walked with my mom down the hallways I'd so frequently walked with her on the other end of the phone. It amplified for me that we are never really alone. She met some favorite familiar faces, people giving up their Christmas to care for others, (and let's be honest, over-time is nice).....but they all worked graciously and I'm so grateful for them. I collected my hugs and we returned to Dom.

Who'd been slowly developing a rash. A rash on Christmas Day that to us served as a sign of the gift of life that Dominic has received.

A rash is a sign of Graft Verses Host Disease.
Some doctors see mild GVHD as a sign that the new cells are fighting any residual cancer cells. Risks of cancer returning after transplant are lowered with signs of early GVHD. We'd hoped for a sign. We asked for a sign.

It's funny; I had a vision yesterday. It came completely out of the blue. Not thinking of the technicalities of this process, or really any specifics at all, I was just walking; I saw some of the cells in Dom's body exploding, almost like in a Star Wars movie, they just disintegrated. I had a flashback of the robot in the hospital that uses UV light to destroy germs. The woman who uses the robot described to us seeing the process under a microscope. The germs would literally explode under the UV rays like someone had taken a hammer to them and made them "splat."

I didn't think overmuch of this, but made it part of my constant prayer. My constant prayer being that his new army will win, and good health will be his.

We want so much for Dominic to get through this year with minimal discomfort and maximum healing. I want to see him able to live life to the fullest; even fuller for all we've experienced.

I called it our Christmas miracle; this rash that the nurses had a little meeting about and told us to keep an eye on. It could get worse. It could. But, I looked at Kathleen, and saw a twinkle in her eye, and somehow believe that as she said, it could be a very good sign.

And as with so many things in life, we must experience a little discomfort before the good comes along.

On this Christmas Day, now that the stockings have been emptied again, the cheese and chocolate have been consumed, we've bid farewell to my mom and the day is winding down, I think of how we've never been alone. Miracles can and do happen. And, we will be hard pressed to top this Christmas.

Merry Christmas to all. With much love from Dom and Cass.